Everybody lies. It may only be “white lies”, but everyone tells lies or “omits the truth” sometimes. People start lying at around age 4 to 5 when children gain an awareness of the use and power of language. This first lying is not ill-natured, but rather to find out, or test, what can be controlled in a child’s environment. Eventually children begin to use lying to get out of trouble or get something they want. White lies, those told to protect someone’s feelings, are not a big deal at all. The person, however, who seems to feel forced to lie about both small and large stuff, has a problem. They lie to protect themselves, look good, gain financially or socially and avoid punishment. A much more troubling group is those who lie a lot, and knowingly, for personal gain. Lying often gets worse with the passage of time. When you get away with a lie, it often forces you to continue your lies. Why do we dislike liars so much? It’s a matter of trust. When people lie, they have broken a bond – an unspoken agreement to treat others as we would like to be treated. Serious lying often makes it impossible for us to trust another person again. Because the issue (问题) of trust is at risk, coming clean about the lie as soon as possible is the best way to mend fences. If the truth only comes out once it is forced, repair of trust is far less likely. As a parent, the most important message you can send to your children about lying is that you always – always – want them to come clean with you. No matter how small a lie they have told, remind them that you would always rather hear the truth, no matter how bad it is, than be cheated. Tell them there is really nothing better in your relationship than your trust of each other.